I went to the Montgomery County Fair in August and as I exited the sheep barn I was asked if I would like to buy a raffle ticket. When I asked what it was for the girls told me it was to win a sheep or pig. I told the girl I would just love a sheep or pig but I lived in a condo and that certainly was not big enough. Then to my dismay she replied "oh no, we cut it up for you" : (

"STRAWBERRY" STEAK

Last Friday I overheard a conversation between River and his dad. He was adamant on the fact that his classmate had eaten "strawberry" steak that day at school for lunch. (Fall 2012)

One L'l Two L'l Three L'l Belly Buttons

River walked in with his holding his shirt up to his neck head down and looking quite puzzled. I asked him what was wrong. Pointing to his two nipples and one belly button, he asked how come all of his belly buttons didn't match. ( Fall 2012)

"SONIC BEANS"

 River and I were walking next to along side a soy bean field which use to be filled with corn, He asked what happened to the corn and what was planted there. That is when I decided to give him a hands on lesson about the soy bean. We walked up to a plant and he picked one off and opened up the pod and I told him about all the things that are made from soy and how it all starts from the bean. He told me how awesome he thought that was and we went on our way. Later that day when his dad arrived home from work he ran to the door and said "Nana! Tell him about the SONIC BEANS!" (Fall 2012)

"Who Moved Those Rocks?"

River and I were walking on his beach last week when he noticed the tide was unusually low. He looked really baffled and asked me.." Nana..who moved all those rocks back?"   (Summer 2012)

Volcano

When I visit River we spend a lot of time on his beach. His Pop Pop manages a restaurant there on the water. As we began one of our usual picnic lunches, his Pop Pop called him over to the restaurant and gave him a bag of chips and some candy for his picnic. He opened the chips and made a squinchy face. The chips were sea salt and vinegar. I asked him if he would like to exchange them. He said no they would  but wondered if he swallowed baking soda could he blow a volcano out of his butt. : )  (summer 2012)

Once in a "Blue Moon"

August 31st was the date of a "blue moon." Forgetting what it meant, I stood there with him at the glass doors pondering the moon. He looked up at me and said.."Oh Nana, we must be too late. They must have already stripped off the blue paint and painted it white again" (summer 2012)

Made in "China"

When I went to Myrtle Beach this past Spring I came across something really cool for River. He doesn't like it when the lights go out when it storms so I picked up a little flashlight looking just like a bumble bee that charges each time you wind it and holds that charge for a good amount of time. It has a switch that turns off and on. It was just the right size to put in his pocket or go under his pillow.

This past weekend I it was his bed time, a storm was brewing, and he began winding it up. Just as I was about to read he turned the bumble bee over and, reading the bottom, said.."Wow! Nana! You went all the way to China to get this for me?!!" (summer 2012)

WEEEEEEEE!!

Guess What!

I guess I'll be heading south on the metro tomorrow. River called earlier and said  "Guess What Nana! You're coming to visit me tomorrow!"

"BUTT"

As usual there were not enough check out clerks in the store so the line was long. Finally another isle opened up so I shuffled River into that isle. Ahead of us was a lady that happened to have an EXTREMELY bulbous rear end that one could put a lunch tray on that just happened to be eye level to River. Fortunately he was looking elsewhere and I held my breath as she made her purchase. Then...out 

of the corner of my eye..WHIP! I saw a double case of whiplash and immediately went in to silent prayer. He said.."Nana..Look at that BIG BUTT!! I said.."Shhh!. He said.."WOW! Look how that butt is sticking out!"..I sternly whispered "stop it..that's rude"..he then said.."oh that's right I am sorry I am not suppose to say that word..but I can say that is huge" He is not allowed to say "butt" (summer 2012)

Secured by "ADT"

Last summer River pointed in the direction of someone's yard and said " I have that"...I said "what?".......He said.."that.."ADT"...  I had to chuckle and I asked him where he heard that. He said he had heard someone talking about it once. The little guy has not been diagnosed with that so feeling disturbed and knowing he likes to read, I asked him to read the rest of the sign. He read "protection and security" and then said "WOW Nana, That's cool!"

Where's the "KING"?

River was approaching 5 and was on his summer vacation at my house. We mad plans  to wake early and walk to the "Donut King" which is just across the way. He let me know that where he lives there is a Dunkin' Donuts but there was no Donut King. As we walked along I began to explain to him that there really wasn't that much difference except maybe the Donut King was smaller. When we entered the bakery a lady, taken by his charm, greeted him good morning and asked what he would like. He then pushed his face against my shorts and became upset. When I asked what was wrong he said. "That's the queen. I thought we were going to see the "KING"  (summer 2011)

Hugs Can Be Strange

River visited me the summer he was about to turn 4. Taking our walk across the street to the shopping center as we always do, we have to pass by two fire hydrants. They are painted dark green on top and light green on the bottom. Part of his disorder included many out of the ordinary surprises and to stop and hug the fire hydrants each time we passed seemed to be something he had to do. Still not speaking he could not tell me why he had to do this. He was only 3 1/2 and really small so he got away with it. lol With autism shapes and shadows can be seen exactly as they appear.  I pondered one of those fire hydrants a couple of days ago. With the lighter color on the bottom and the darker on top ..it looked like a little man standing there with a hat and his were stretched out waiting for a hug.

A Little Over The Top

Ok, well...I guess I went a little over the top last night about wanting everyone to expect so much humor that they would wet their pants. Though that would be nice I just  want to share my stories and hope you find them as amusing and humorous as I do. But then again I guess I should stick by my warnings..like they do on the medicine bottles..just to CMA.

It's A Shame

It was a hot Summer day and River had come to visit so I walked him across the street to some ice cream. There was a man walking toward us and River decided to say hello. The man did not respond so he repeated his greeting. Finally on the third try he said.."Nana, It's a shame. that man can not hear"

Let The Fun Begin!

Ok. Now that we have taken care of all the serious stuff and we have a little back ground on this character. There are situations and antics from time to time that I find myself in as his Nana. River has come up with quite a few moments that will surely raise a brow or two.  Hopefully in the future after opening this page and reading my blogs, you will spit your drink through your nose and on to your screen or maybe just slightly pee your pants. This is what I will be trying to accomplish anyway. So get your beverage and get comfortable..just make sure it isn't hot. Enjoy the weeks to come....

River "I Made It"

On January 23, 2007 River was airlifted from St. Mary’s County to Johns Hopkins in Baltimore. He did not have the breath- suck- swallow -reflex of a typical newborn. After a couple of weeks he came home and seemed fine. In the next few months it was evident he was not reaching his milestones... there was not much response to his name and no babbling..in fact he replaced any attempt at speech with humming. At a year he still could not sit up. When he began walking he walked on his tippy toes.

River was entered into a special program meeting his needs called "infant and toddlers" that is wonderful. He had a physical therapist who worked on his cognitive and motor skills..and then a speech therapist who helped him with tastes and textures. He had oral sensitivity issues. He continued to hum from the time he opened his eyes at sunrise until he closed his eyes at night. It wasn't a musical hum but a monotone hum. He would take a breathe hum..take a breath..hum. He also began to shuffle his little thumbs across the other four fingers really fast as you do when you are telling someone to give you money. lol. So when you were close to him you would hear little swishing and humming. He continued with the special needs Preschool program.

He had made visits to developmental physicians and his parents were told that he could  possibly be "on the autism spectrum" but they were not sure exactly where at that point. All of the things I have previously listed are typical of a child with autism. So he continued his therapy and was learning sign language to communicate his needs. He picked up the basics quickly and made up a few of his own like "I'm hungry." I guess it was around the summer he was about to turn 4, we would sit on the beach and write ABCs in the sand. I would listen to him hum and wonder if he would ever speak again as he followed my fingers.There are plenty of children who learn to speak later than this but even though there was plenty of encouragement there was always that tiny bit of doubt. It still really tears me to think about it. Even though it all turned out fine it was just that heart wrenching to me.

One day  I was reading him one of his favorite books filled with colorful pictures of vegetables. He would rub his belly when we got to the cauliflower and say mm mm mm..which was funny cuz he would not would  not eat ANYTHING. The therapist was still coming to help him with food textures. lol But on that hot Summer day in August, I got to the page with the bright red apple..and he pointed at it and said.."a ul"...kinda sounding like the word ass hole if you will without the 'ss' lol. I made him do it again. It was his first attempt at a sound! I took him on a walk later that day and he pointed to a tractor and said."a..er" no emphasis on the r.....From then on, he hummed and spoke in vowels until he reached the age of four. Unusual...but bet you can't do it. lol oh yeah..and don't forget the swishing fingers.

Four was huge year for him. Probably the most difficult so far in his life. Just 4 months before he had learned how to talk and he had a lot of catching up to do if he was going to fix stuff. He had a hard row to hoe. No humming, no swishing. He taught himself to read. We thought the school had taught him and they thought he was taught at home. He has worked so hard. Now he is just so smart that he helps the teachers teach the other kids with their work. He reads to the class. We are talking pre-school!

River was taken back to his developmental physician for a review. After spending some time with him he said he wasn't diagnosing him with autism. I still see things left over here or there but I guess he is still working on them......I JUST DON'T GIVE A DAMN EITHER WAY!

Two biggest obstacles right now are:
#1) Making a friend: ...River, just play with them. Don't talk about how happy you are that they are there.

#2) Dealing with Anger: not going so well..although I'd be angry as hell too if I had gone through all this shit!

River graduated from the special needs preschool in the Spring..He was tested in all the different skills and he has been released from all special programs to the regular Elementary School Kindergarten this year. He starts Wednesday August 22, 2012 so PLEASE! PLEASE ......, Rub the belly of Buddha..Pray to Jesus and thank God or...bow to  Alah...or whatever it is that you do, that he IS ok out there in the UNSPECIAL WORLD..because it looks like....he is gonna make it.