WEEEEEEEE!!

Guess What!

I guess I'll be heading south on the metro tomorrow. River called earlier and said  "Guess What Nana! You're coming to visit me tomorrow!"

"BUTT"

As usual there were not enough check out clerks in the store so the line was long. Finally another isle opened up so I shuffled River into that isle. Ahead of us was a lady that happened to have an EXTREMELY bulbous rear end that one could put a lunch tray on that just happened to be eye level to River. Fortunately he was looking elsewhere and I held my breath as she made her purchase. Then...out 

of the corner of my eye..WHIP! I saw a double case of whiplash and immediately went in to silent prayer. He said.."Nana..Look at that BIG BUTT!! I said.."Shhh!. He said.."WOW! Look how that butt is sticking out!"..I sternly whispered "stop it..that's rude"..he then said.."oh that's right I am sorry I am not suppose to say that word..but I can say that is huge" He is not allowed to say "butt" (summer 2012)

Secured by "ADT"

Last summer River pointed in the direction of someone's yard and said " I have that"...I said "what?".......He said.."that.."ADT"...  I had to chuckle and I asked him where he heard that. He said he had heard someone talking about it once. The little guy has not been diagnosed with that so feeling disturbed and knowing he likes to read, I asked him to read the rest of the sign. He read "protection and security" and then said "WOW Nana, That's cool!"

Where's the "KING"?

River was approaching 5 and was on his summer vacation at my house. We mad plans  to wake early and walk to the "Donut King" which is just across the way. He let me know that where he lives there is a Dunkin' Donuts but there was no Donut King. As we walked along I began to explain to him that there really wasn't that much difference except maybe the Donut King was smaller. When we entered the bakery a lady, taken by his charm, greeted him good morning and asked what he would like. He then pushed his face against my shorts and became upset. When I asked what was wrong he said. "That's the queen. I thought we were going to see the "KING"  (summer 2011)

Hugs Can Be Strange

River visited me the summer he was about to turn 4. Taking our walk across the street to the shopping center as we always do, we have to pass by two fire hydrants. They are painted dark green on top and light green on the bottom. Part of his disorder included many out of the ordinary surprises and to stop and hug the fire hydrants each time we passed seemed to be something he had to do. Still not speaking he could not tell me why he had to do this. He was only 3 1/2 and really small so he got away with it. lol With autism shapes and shadows can be seen exactly as they appear.  I pondered one of those fire hydrants a couple of days ago. With the lighter color on the bottom and the darker on top ..it looked like a little man standing there with a hat and his were stretched out waiting for a hug.

A Little Over The Top

Ok, well...I guess I went a little over the top last night about wanting everyone to expect so much humor that they would wet their pants. Though that would be nice I just  want to share my stories and hope you find them as amusing and humorous as I do. But then again I guess I should stick by my warnings..like they do on the medicine bottles..just to CMA.